Managing Toddler Emotions: Strategies to Help Children Express and Understand Their Feelings

Just like an adult who can feel fear, joy, pain or surprise, a child is capable of feeling different emotions from a young age. Young children face challenges in understanding and controlling their emotions, which differentiates them from adults. For this, young children need your help to learn to recognize their feelings and try to control them.

Develop emotions

In addition to stimulating a child's senses, it is also crucial to know how to manage their emotions. The latter are spontaneous and authentic physiological responses to various situations, manifesting themselves at any time and in any place, just like the sensory activities. 

• Primary emotions: 

The very first emotions a child develops are called primary emotions. This kind of emotion appears during the first year of life. It can be fear, anger, pain, disgust, joy, etc.

• Secondary emotions: 

Secondary emotions appear around the age of two, when the child gradually becomes aware of the world around him, when he feels different from others and when he begins to make his own decisions. This discovery of personality helps him to feel emotions linked to consciousness, such as jealousy or even the desire, to eat or play for example.

From a certain age, little by little and step by step, your little angel will begin to feel other emotions linked to discipline, the understanding of certain standards and the desire to achieve goals. It can be pride, guilt, or even shame.

To take an example, if your little angel knows that he is forbidden from making doodles on the walls and he disobeys this, he may feel guilty. If, for example, he succeeds in solving a puzzle after a lot of concentration and effort, he can also feel pride.

The advantages of knowing how to manage the emotions of little ones well 

It is essential to teach your child to recognize and manage their emotions. For what ? Quite simply because it will allow him to move forward better in life, to behave well with others and above all to control himself by knowing how to follow the imposed rules. In this way, he will know how to react to a situation, and will adapt his behavior accordingly. For example, he would know how to control himself or calm down if he is angry instead of shouting or getting into fights. However, be aware that self-control will take time and each child has their own pace. So don't rush things and be lenient with your little one!

Furthermore, a child who knows how to control his emotions reacts much better to different situations. Good self-control will also allow you to maintain a good relationship with others when play outdoors for example, or even better success in life.

Contrary to this, a child who has difficulty managing his emotions will have more difficulty handling usual situations. By accumulating sadness, suffering, anger, fear and frustration, the child could generate aggressive behavior, this could be associated with anxiety reactions and harm his daily development and his relationships with others, but above all to his future. 

How to help your little one recognize their emotions?

This is not an easy task, but that said, it is not impossible either! The first step is to teach him to recognize what he feels. Then will come the management of your emotions. Here are some tips that might be helpful to you.

It is essential to start talking about emotions with your little one from a young age. You can ask him about emotions that you have noticed in him. For example, you can say: “Are you crying, are you sad because we are going to leave? »

As your child gets older, you can talk to them about secondary emotions. You can address possessiveness, disappointment and jealousy or even guilt around the age of three. 

To help your little one recognize emotions, you can also use body language based on the emotion. Use educational toys, books of stories for children or the music to show him characters or facial expressions that express emotions. For example, point out that when someone is happy, they smile, or when someone is angry, they frown, and when someone is sad, a few tears fall from their eyes, etc.

Mirror games are also an excellent way to express different facial expressions depending on the emotion. You can have fun together in front of a mirror imitating different expressions. In this way, a child will be able to know himself better through the expression of his emotions. Another idea for learning to recognize emotions is to create an emotion album with your child by cutting out different expressions from magazines, for example.

When he is experiencing a situation, teach him to recognize what is happening in his body when he is experiencing it in the moment. You can try to explain to him the physical signs you observed. For example, when the child is surprised, explain to him how he feels, or when he is afraid, he seems to be shaking. 

These little things will help your child learn to recognize his or her emotions little by little.

The importance of helping a child overcome and manage their emotions

Depending on a child's age, the answer they give will certainly not be the same, but you can still ask them how their heart felt when they are scared or angry. 

Moreover, you can also talk to him about your emotions which explain some of your reactions according to his behavior. For example, if you have been patient with him or when you are disappointed with his behavior. This will help him better differentiate right from wrong, while learning to manage his emotions.

How can I help him to better control his emotions?

Before the age of five, a child does not yet have control over his or her emotions. He is often impulsive and generally cannot control his reactions. Your child may have a tendency to break things, hit someone, or move around without paying attention because he is angry or just excited. Even beyond the age of 5, children are not yet fully capable of understanding their feelings and having the right reactions.

You therefore have a duty to allow him to experience and express his emotions, while showing him how to control them. Here are a few tips :

• Stay attentive and don't judge their emotions

For example, during a crisis, be calm and attentive. If your child is very angry or crying, let him calm down first. You can cuddle and comfort him so that he calms down before talking to him calmly and asking him about the problem.

• Teach your child to love animals

Children who are able to express their emotions often have a greater capacity for empathy towards animals. Loving animals can help a child develop social and emotional skills by learning to care for another living being and recognize their needs.

You can opt for an animal wall night light, not only encouraging your child's peaceful sleep, but also cultivates their love for animals and strengthens their ability to manage their emotions with gentleness and comfort.

• Question your child to help them identify what triggered their reaction

Your child may be angry, but he himself doesn't know what makes him angry. 

Tell your child that their feelings and reactions are normal and that you understand why they feel the way they do. This will help him feel understood and reassured.

It is very important to take time to listen to your child even if you are in a hurry or have a lot of things to do. A child needs to feel heard and understood in order to move on.

• Talking about your emotions with your family

At family dinners, tell a story that made you happy or sad. This will inspire your child to do the same and share their feelings.

Suggest new strategies for managing your child's emotions without forcing them. Wait for the right time to tell him about it like when he calms down so he can remember it.

Conclusion

A child who knows how to manage his emotions is able to react better to life situations and get along well with others. To do this, you must teach him and make him understand that emotions can be controlled, even if they are young. You can help him put into words what he is feeling at the moment he is experiencing a situation so that he can learn to differentiate between different emotions.

Finally, you can also get your child used to talking about what he is experiencing, to expressing what he feels while helping him manage his emotions.